Stability

August 8, 2019

Writing a short article on gratitude every night can be somewhat of a challenge. It’s not that there is any shortage of things for which to be thankful; it’s that there are so many that it’s sometimes hard to choose, especially if part of the goal is to be an encouragement to others. This morning I was in a meeting with a city attorney who had once been a teacher, a school administrator, and a former director of a youth club. We were discussing how to better work together for our community so we might be able to head off some of the violent tragedies that seem so commonplace these days. This particular meeting grew out of a stabbing earlier this year that resulted in the death of a young teenage girl. 

The others in the discussion group talked about various incidents in which they had become involved, either as legal counsel or as intervention. Broken homes, fatherless boys, cultural differences, poverty, violent subcultures—for some children, the wonder is that they made it through at all. I am not unaware of all this, but it’s a different world from the one I inhabit. Once when our sons were young, they tried to call our bluff regarding our discipline. “We’ll call the hotline!” They threatened.

“Go ahead,” we replied. “Matter of fact, we’ll give you the number. Go into foster care. See how that works out for you.” One of the first times Matt stayed overnight at a friend’s house, he came home utterly amazed. He hadn’t realized that not every family sits down for meals together, or that not every mom and dad stay together. “You don’t realize how much of a leg up you have on so many of your friends,” we told them, “simply because of the stability you have at home. You never have to worry about whether or not we will be together when you come home at night.” 

Once, after learning of another marriage that had fallen apart, I sat our three kids down and told them, “If I ever leave your mother, you have every right to believe that everything I ever taught you about God is a lie.”

Linda was aghast. “You can’t tell them that!” 

“They need to know how serious this is, and I need to remind myself how serious this is,” was all I said.

I’m thinking about all this after our meeting this morning. I was given so much by way of my family—stuff I took for granted until I realized how uncommon my life was. Two sets of grandparents within a 45 minute drive, parents whose commitment to each other and to us gave us a stability that essentially showed us God’s faithfulness. I am grateful for this family history, and for a wife whose integrity and faithfulness made it possible to pass the torch to my children and grandchildren. My life is not the most exciting; adventure wasn’t a part of the Bailey DNA. But faithfulness and loyalty were, for which I am thankful tonight.