Pain

August 2, 2020

Whenever I get a text from our church’s prayer chain, I expect to hear of someone having surgery or dealing with a medical condition, asking for healing. Occasionally, it is a request for prayers on behalf of someone grieving or in need of a job or a different place to live. Very rarely a request comes across for someone’s salvation. I cannot recall a single time someone asked to be able to discern the hand of God in their troubles, which makes me ask, “What if instead of praying for healing, we desired to know Christ better through the affliction?” I ask this not as a rhetorical question, but in all practicality.

For the past two years, I’ve had a recurring pain in my left hip. It started in May, just before a few of us from church were scheduled to embark on a jungle trek in Cuba. Knowing we would be hiking up and down mountain trails for three days, I was a bit worried. I prayed hard before leaving, and God heard my prayers; I had no problems whatsoever on the trip. But when we returned, it flared up again, and has steadily gotten worse over the intervening years. It’s not debilitating, but I’ve talked to my primary care doctor, and made numerous trips to the chiropractor. The latter helps momentarily, but before long, that hip is jabbing me, calling for attention. Between that and the stabbing pains in my left hand, there are things I can no longer do, and I certainly don’t look forward to that day when I can no longer play my bass.

Jacob’s story continues to arrest me. I woke this morning thinking of how after wrestling with God through the night, Jacob limped back to his family. To someone who has never had difficulties walking, these are mere words; we hear them, picture the scene in our minds, draw whatever lessons there are to be learned, and go on our way, thoughtlessly nursing whatever wounds, aches, and pains we have. Having a hip that keeps grabbing my attention suddenly makes this story take on new meaning for me. What if this pain is God’s reminder of his work and presence in my life? What if every time it sends a shock up my spine, God is whispering, “Listen to Me?” Too often, our aches and pains instead become the lens through which we view life; our focus begins to turn inward till all we see is what is wrong in our world.

The Enemy of our souls is a liar, and one of his most effective lies is that our troubles are terminal, that health issues, relationship problems, or financial troubles spell the end of meaningful life. This is not to minimize our problems, but too often I’ve watched people’s attitude to turn a temporary valley into a permanent hole in the ground, otherwise known as a grave. Lord knows, I’ve done it often enough myself, but over the years I’ve learned how foolish it is to allow my situation or other people shrink my world to it’s immediate circumstances and how they affect me. It all becomes quite narcissistic. God always stands outside and above this world; as long as there is a God in heaven, there is no reason for me to allow my world to shrink so small as to not include him and the possibilities he brings to life. This hip that makes me limp then ceases to be an obstacle, and instead becomes an opportunity to seek Christ, and in seeking, I find him, and in finding him, I find life.