Monday, September 28, 2015

Quiet Prayers

September 28, 2015

The rain came softly today. Barely a mist, it silently put a shine on the grass and the leaves of the trees as it hung in the air and finally touched the ground. I was working on the tile in the front room, finishing up the few pieces that had to wait till the door was set. Tomorrow God willing, the grouting begins. It's a messy job, but once it's done, the only thing left is to rebuild the trim around the front door. It's a good feeling finishing a job, and although I'm not quite there, it's close enough that I can almost taste it.

It was a quiet day with no people at all except Linda until worship practice and men's group tonight. Almost a Sabbath, I took time to read and pray before tackling the tile. A friend recently lent me a little book on prayer by David Jeremiah, in which he mentioned how difficult prayer is for him. I was more than a little surprised, as I've always imagined that these guys who have national presence with their radio and video productions wouldn't struggle with the same things that plague me. I've always thought it a bit embarrassing to have to admit that the very disciplines in which as a pastor I ought to excel were where I feel like a novice. But I learned something: if I dwell on the discipline, that's all I get, and it remains a task to be completed, a burden to be borne, the sort of thing we just grit our teeth and get through it. But if I use the time to focus on Christ--who he is, what he has done, and being in communion with him--then it ceases being something I check off on my daily to-do list, and becomes what it was meant to be: connecting with the living God. I'm still working on it; still after all these years very much a novice, but I'm not giving up, and someday what is done by faith will be reality seen and experienced on an entirely new level.

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