Grandfathering

 March 19, 2022

“For He established a testimony in Jacob, 

And appointed a law in Israel, 

Which He commanded our fathers, 

That they should make them known to their children; 

That the generation to come might know them, 

The children who would be born, 

That they may arise and declare them to their children, 

That they may set their hope in God, 

And not forget the works of God, But keep His commandments;” Psalm 78:5-7 

As parents or grandparents, we often look back on our parenting years with at least a small amount of regret. We see the teaching opportunities we missed, the times we disciplined not out of love, but of anger, the times we were so busy with work or even church that our kids felt that they were add-ons, of lesser value than other, important things in our lives.

My grandchildren occasionally tell us some of the habits their parents have developed, like “High-Low” around the dinner table where each one has to say what their high for the day was, and if necessary, the low. Or the question “Where did you see God at work today?” I wish I had thought of those kinds of questions when my kids were young.

We did some things right, too. We were at almost every one of their swim meets, concerts, and musicals. We took in some of their friends who needed a safe home. I insisted they speak to their mother and each other with respect. Once, when one of the boys raised his voice to Linda, I jumped all over him. “I don’t speak to her that way, and you won’t, either!”

But there were those times I failed. I wasn’t the example they needed. Mine is the lament of every parent: “I could have done better.” At such times, Scriptures like those of this psalm take on fresh meaning. God gave me the responsibility of teaching my children, that they might teach theirs, and for good measure, he added another generation to it. I could cite Scripture after Scripture that emphasizes the importance of this fatherly responsibility. I can’t pawn it off on the preacher or Sunday School teacher or youth leader. It is my job. Mine alone. The others can help, but they can never take my place.

This is good news to me as a grandfather. It tells me my job isn’t done. Churches and society are filled with boys whose fathers either don’t know or don’t care to shoulder the responsibility. My kids are grown; my grandchildren almost so. But there are others; boys who need a man who can show them what male godliness is all about, girls who need a man who can love them as they deserve to be loved, with a purity that fills their hearts so they won’t need to look for love with boy-men who don’t know how to give it.

I spent the better part of the day today with hundreds of men who want to make a difference. The good news is, it’s never too late. We cannot change our mistakes of the past, but we can build a new future by the grace of God. May we be wise and courageous enough to do so, for their sakes, and to the glory of our God and Savior, Jesus Christ. Another generation is coming!