Tension

November 4, 2017

At a wedding I attended (note: “attended,” not “officiated!” That’s a switch!) today, the pastor in his homily to the couple spoke of the importance of tension in a marriage. He quoted an older man who once told him that tension in a marriage is not a sign that something’s wrong; it’s a sigh that something’s happening. The pastor kept talking about how that works out in a healthy marriage, but my mind kept spinning around the idea of tension.

I’m no great shakes at being a musician, but it doesn’t take a maestro to understand the importance of tension in music. Any stringed instrument depends on tension; without it, it’s impossible to make a sound. It’s the tension that when the string is plucked or hit, sets up the waves that make the sound. The more tension is applied, the higher the pitch that sounds. Tension is absolutely essential to make music. There’s more to it than that, but tension is the foundation of it all.

If more strings are added, all at different tensions, it is possible to have them vibrating in a pleasing manner, producing harmony. If the tensions are mismatched, there will instead be dissonance. It’s like that in a marriage, too. Two different people who are trying to get close to each other will encounter tension. If not, one of them is unnecessary, or they aren’t trying to get close. The issue is not the tension, but whether or not they are seeking harmony in the different notes they are playing. Apart from intentionally tuning their individual strings to each other, they will only produce noise. But when they tune their different strings to each other, there is beautiful harmony. And when Christ is present in the home, the three part harmony can be absolutely heavenly. So Tony and Erin, tighten your strings till they sing, then adjust them to each other so your life together will be a symphony of love and grace for all to hear.