4:30 am

November 29, 2018

Crawling out of bed at 4:30 am is not exactly on my bucket list, but that’s what I did this morning. My son needed my tractor and bucket to spread gravel in the muddy driveway of one of his rental properties. His schedule for the day required him to be in town by 8:00 am, so he needed to be able to load it on his trailer by 7:30. Had it not been snowing non-stop for two days, that wouldn’t have been a problem, but snow it did. Another six inches overnight meant another couple hours of plowing before I was willing to part with my equipment. 

Lest this sound like a complaint, rising at 4:30 has its charms. The snow was silently drifting earthward, sparkling and dancing like summer dust motes in the headlights of the tractor. The throaty growl of the motor was the only sound piercing the silence, and the smell of the diesel as I filled the tank had an earthy fragrance all its own. It wasn’t one of those bitterly cold mornings that sting the lungs when you inhale. Carhartts, insulated leather mittens and Muck boots kept me quite toasty.

I am grateful for a warm bed at night, the love of my life breathing softly beside me, ears that though far from perfect, could hear the alarm, for strength and health enough to do the job, for equipment that makes it possible for this old body to clean out the driveway, for a clean bill of health from today’s checkup, and for my faith in Christ that gives meaning to it all. The life I’ve been privileged to live is more than I could have ever imagined, and far more than I deserve. “To whom much is given, much shall be required,” says the Scriptures, and is one reason my retirement was so short-lived. Like St. Paul, I am indebted not only to God, but to those who gave me life and education, and opportunity, but unlike most debts, it is not a burden from which some day I hope to be free, but a responsibility I hope to fulfill faithfully until God in his mercy calls me home.