Thursday, August 28, 2014

The Myth of General Gratitude

August 28, 2014

Each evening, I write about something for which I am thankful. It's been a good discipline that has yielded the unexpected benefits of peace of mind, greater happiness, and a deeper understanding of God's grace. But even with all these blessings, I've noticed that lately I've been waking up with that same old ennui that plagued me for so many years; maybe not with the same intensity, but it does seem to have returned to nip at my heels again. I suspect that keeping my eyes peeled for some particular relationship, event, or thing, while beneficial in one sense, has at the same time distracted me from simply seeing what IS.

This morning as I awoke, I lay in bed not wondering what I would be thankful for today, but instead actually praying and thanking God for the blessings I've received. I thanked him for people in my life, for health and home, for the goodness and grace that continues to pursue me in spite of myself. I prayed for people in need, for our country and its leaders, for this sad and weary world that teeters on the edge of armageddon.

I had to go to town later in the day, and on the way, I was overwhelmed with life itself. It was a beautiful sunny day, with wisps of clouds overhead, cool temperatures, and a slight breeze; just right for the bike. My errands took me slowly through Amish country with its horse-drawn buggies, bonnet-topped girls, and barefoot boys. I passed a pair of Clydesdales hauling a wagon load of wood out of a field. Their homes are simple, always painted white, and often with a vegetable stand out front. For the entire twenty minute ride, I just lived in the moment, grateful for what I was seeing, for what I've been given, for life itself. Again I prayed, because generalized gratitude is slippery and elusive. I should know. It's one thing to be generally grateful; it's quite another to actually thank God. Without him, my gratitude is only partial. Thankfully, I do have him to thank, and today, I am not just thankful; I am thankful to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Author and Giver of life.

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