Hard Blessings

December 29, 2019

“From the Jews five times I received forty stripes minus one. Three times I was beaten with rods; once I was stoned; three times I was shipwrecked; a night and a day I have been in the deep; in journeys often, in perils of waters, in perils of robbers, in perils of my own countrymen, in perils of the Gentiles, in perils in the city, in perils in the wilderness, in perils in the sea, in perils among false brethren; in weariness and toil, in sleeplessness often, in hunger and thirst, in fastings often, in cold and nakedness— besides the other things, what comes upon me daily: my deep concern for all the churches.” —II Corinthians 11:24-28 NKJV

The weather so far this December has been unsettled. Cold and snow has given way to a cold rainy drizzle; tomorrow is supposed to hit 50F before plummeting below freezing on New Year’s Eve. I’ve often said I prefer a hard snow to a freezing rain; the rain somehow goes right through me, chilling me to the bone. Today’s weather made me think of St. Paul’s words about all he endured for the sake of the Gospel. The weather is what it is; we live with it, but don’t often place ourselves in its path for any purpose, let alone the Gospel. Tonight I sit in our back room before a cozy fire and a lazy dog. Whatever is happening outside, inside I’m quite comfortable. 

Paul recounts times of persecution and torture, in danger from people, and struggling for life in circumstances that would prompt most of us to retreat to safer and more comfortable surroundings. Towards the end of his list he speaks of cold and nakedness, and I can picture him shivering in the rain, praying for morning and a break in the clouds. When I was much younger, my sons and I would canoe in Algonquin Park in Canada...in October. I remember well shivering through the lengthening nights, wondering if morning were ever going to come so I could get up, build a fire and try to warm my hands and feet and everything in between.

This morning, our pastor invited us to give voice to the blessings we’ve received in 2019. Health, friendships, family were all mentioned. I didn’t chime in, but I am thankful for the hard blessings of the cold that helps me appreciate the warmth, of the disappointments that highlight by contrast the fulfillments, the feeling of God’s absence that helps me enjoy all the more those times when I feel his presence, the struggle to understand Scripture that fades in the light that explodes in my head when I finally see and understand. 

Without the cold, we cannot appreciate the comfort, without the persecution, we cannot fully know the peace, without the conviction of sin, we cannot fully know the joy of salvation. Not only for the good times, but for the hard and bad, I give thanks tonight.