Happy birthday Linda

January 17, 2019

Sometimes being ahead of the game can get you painted into a corner. 

Christmas is no sooner over than I’m thinking of what to get Linda next year, and usually I have most of her presents hidden away by late August, with perhaps only a couple odds and ends left for shopping during the Christmas season. And since her birthday is in February, I usually lump everything together and simply decide towards the end of December which will be Christmas gifts and which I’ll save for her birthday. It’s called planning ahead, and when it comes to Linda, I’m not too shabby at it.

When the grandkids are here for their twice-monthly overnight, either pancakes or French toast, sausages, and eggs are standard breakfast fare. I used to do everything on the old cast iron griddle we have hanging from the butcher’s block, but Linda convinced me to use her old electric fry pan; “It’ll be quicker and easier,” she said. This particular electric fry pan I think was a wedding present, so it’s seen better days. Everything on it works, but over the years, the heat has warped the bottom so all the oil puddles into a two-inch circle the middle, leaving the rest of it high and dry. Needless to say, it’s not the best scenario for flapjacks. So—just before Christmas I decided to buy her a new one, but since I already had enough stuff for Christmas, the fry pan became a birthday gift.

Fast forward to today. She had an appointment with the eye doctor and had a couple errands to run in town. Not having anything pressing, I offered to chauffeur her and take her out to dinner, an offer she couldn’t, and didn’t, refuse. One of the errands involved a trip to the mall, and here is where I made my fatal mistake. The kitchen store in the mall is having a going out of business sale, so I suggested we pop in to see if there were anything there she needed. She agreed, and upon entering immediately asked about electric frypans. The sales lady showed us to the remaining selection, whereupon Linda looked them over, asking me repeatedly which one I thought would be best. I said nothing, in my mind just watching her birthday surprise fizzle and fade.

“So which one do you like?” Her tone was getting a bit more demanding, so yes, I admit it...I folded. 

“You can have one of these, or the one I already bought you for your birthday!” I had to admit I was trapped.

“So THAT’S why you weren’t saying anything. Wait! For my birthday? Sounds to me like you bought it for yourself; after all, you’ve been the one complaining about the fry pan.”

Well, another birthday bites the dust, in more ways than one. I guess planning ahead doesn’t always get you any brownie points. Thankfully, I’m married to a woman with a good sense of humor. Married to me, she needs it often.